Today I saw an old episode of The Dr. Phil show entitled Racy Tweens and it was both heartbreaking and unbelievable at the same time. I walked in on the back end, where Dr. Phil was speaking with a mother and her 10 year old daughter. The mother began by sharing how she has trouble saying “NO” to her daughter who, at 10 years old, has a monthly spa bill of $600.
As I watched in amazement I was thinking to myself, “Really…I am a grown, working adult and I don’t have a monthly spa bill of anything even close to that amount”. As Dr. Phil spoke to the mother it was revealed that in an effort to please her daughter, the mother would buy the things she wanted, despite the fact that she often would put off basic household essentials like the families utility bill, because it was just that difficult to say “NO”.
Watching the show reminded me of so many of the young girls I have come in contact with over the years, who sadly are growing up with too much too soon. In an effort to make things better for their children, many parents are, in essence, hurting their children by focusing more on cash and materialism than on character. As a result, many kids, and especially girls, begin to equate their worth and value with the material things they possess.
Just think, if a young girl has a spa bill of $600/month at age 10, what in the world will she be expecting at 20 years old? Don’t get me wrong, I totally understand a mother’s desire to give her daughter fine things and shower her with gifts. As parents, my husband and I love to bless our children with nice things too, but we also have a responsibility to teach them real lessons in wisdom responsibility and stewardship.
Although, this mother was focused on a $600/month spa allowance and $1,500 birthday party, there are plenty of others who spend the same type of money on expensive electronics, shoes and clothes. I could sense the mothers embarrassment and frustration as she admitted that her daughter’s attitude and sense of entitlement was something she created.
If I had an opportunity to speak to that mother or any other parents dealing with a similar predicament, I would provide these simple six tips:
Dr. nicole steele
Through Her Priceless Posts, Dr. Nicole Steele shares her Priceless Perspective on real life issues pertaining to women, girls, families and youth workers.